uh...

[ateolf]

so, tonight was like the date or something...i believe i've come to the conclusion that i quite like this girl...i was gonna do more of a ramble from a what-i'm-thinking perspective, but i think i'll muddle stuff up so i'll give a bit of chronology on the night and throw in the what-i'm-thinking crap as i go along...some friend of theirs (they being Megan and her rommate Nichole) was originally planned to come over and cook something, but his presence was cancelled or something so when i got there, Megan and i walked to Kroger and some pasta was bought, then cooked, and eaten...we watched bad tv, most of the time making fun of said bad television...speaking of television, guess what her favorite tv show is...if you know me, then i'm sure you've guessed The Simpsons and are indeed correct! her taste in music isn't that great (though it's far from the worst...and there are at least some exceptions of great stuff...though i haven't audited her entire collection...yet...) but am i learning that there is more to a person than their taste in music? hrm...i don't think so...but i still find myself liking her anyway...so Nichole left after a while to do something else (the original plan had been her and i guess other people going to see the movie too...but it ended up just being the two of us...) we sat around watching more tv...talking some...me being incredibly nervous...then we left to go see Irreversible...here's the part where i take a side-step and talk just about how fucking great this movie is...this is probably one of the best movies i have ever seen...i won't go into detail or anything, but yes, it is pretty fucking graphic...also a lot of the camera work is prob'ly not recommended for those with epilepsy...i tend to be a bit wary of movies that have a bit of unweildy camerawork that moves around a bunch...but this film pulled it off so fucking well...it's not the whole movie...there's even at least one long section that i can think of off the top of my head where it doesn't move at all...but i digress, partially at least...one point there are these spanish prostitutes (i believe the movie is french) and they speak in spanish and their subtitles are in spanish too (as they're supposed to be foreign) and for the first few bits of their dialogue i didn't even register that i was reading something in a foreign language...i mean, i didn't understand the spanish perfectly, but it felt natural at least looking at it and seeing what i can read and deciphering context and all...it took me a short bit to notice there was a change at all...i thought that was pretty cool...i mean, i'm still far from being able to reasonably speak it but that made me feel a little good about my spanish skills...as anyone who knows me knows, 2001: A Space Odyssey is my favoritest movie ever...Irreversible even has a not-so-subtle homage to that masterpiece...and even had that not been in there, i would have had to compare it to 2001, at least in its treatment of time...of course to different effect...i feel impulsed to go on about that, but i'll cut it short and get back to the whole Megan issue...besides, i find movies best knowing as little about them before viewing, so i like to treat others to that same respect...anyway, she even bought my ticket...i know absolutely nothing at all about girls, but it seems to me that's some sort of sign...argh! she liked the movie too...definately not something that could be enjoyed by everybody...or even 5% of everybody...she gets definate points for that...and the fact that she decided we should go see that movie...it may very well be THE WORST date movie ever...she definately gets more points for that as well! then back to her apartment...she invited me up again...her roommate was still gone...we sat around watching more tv and talking some more...after maybe an hour, a little longer i guess i don't know, she was tired and went to bed...she had work in the morning anyway...no kiss or anything...but i'm half-beating myself over the question of if i should have...i don't know...perhaps it's better to err on the side of caution in this regard...but i'm ALWAYS erring on the side of caution...i NEVER DO anything...ahh! why do girls have to suck so much!? not girls personally, but the whole idea of the whole thing...well, at least for me...i guess suave playas have no qualms in these regards...i feel like i'm in high school right now! except when i was in high school there weren't any girls in the picture...at all...and not just 'cuz i went to an all boys school...i mean, at all...outside of school...anywhere...me and girls just did not cross paths...anyway, no, i still don't know her too well yet, but from what i'm starting to know, i really like her...oh, she also has one of the coolest cats ever...it's constantly freaking out and running everywhere...but back to her...wait, i think i was just gonna repeat myself again...i'm not good at reading girls at all...in fact, i'm completely clueless...but it seems like she prob'ly still likes me...though i have paranoid notions of having blown it by being too timid...i'll quit rambling though...anyone who actually made it through all this, feel free to throw any imput...of course you don't know her (and many of you don't know me), but it goes to reason that most everyone has more experience in the whole "dating" realm than me...okay...done...now...